Wrestling still

I want to write. I think about it all the time, but I hesitate to start. Yet it’s not hard to do. Sometimes words just come at me while my hands are moving, no idea what’s coming next. It’s like writing’s a job that I don’t really want to start, and yet to be good at it you have to do it every day. There’s a writing muscle that needs the practice and when I don’t write for a few days there’s a real difference in my word flow.

Why can’t I just think of it as a routine thing like cleaning teeth, and showering and getting dressed? None of that is inspiring or enjoyable, it just has to be done. For some reason I think writing has to be good all the time, that when I write it has to be amazing. But it’s just words. Then again noone is going to care how or when I clean my teeth, but they will if I write well or badly.

So it has to be that people are going to judge it. Someone might see what I write and hate it. Hell I’m writing this now hoping noone sees it. Sigh. How do you overcome this? I don’t know..

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